I've been trying to drown my rejection by eating far, far too many chips and re-reading my favorite books, but ideas for improving my manuscript keep encroaching on my pity party. That's the problem with brains.
Besides, I can't give it the proper maudlin concern because twice a week I get to put on a YELLOW hapkido belt. That's right. We took our belt tests and my kids and I all passed. We are no longer whiteys, and all those stripes I worked so hard for have gone the way of most other pieces of used tape.
Against the backdrop of the black hapkido clothes, the yellow belt is especially bee-like.
It was a lot of fun to watch my kids. Their attitudes during the evaluations reflect their attitudes in general. My oldest did everything that was asked of her with smiling determination and a disinterest in detail. My middle child put all his considerable energy into doing everything perfectly with an intensity rivaled only by a few other members of my family. My youngest viewed the whole thing as a game and played joyfully.
To tell you the truth, I'm not sure where I fit on this spectrum. Probably pretty close to my middle child. Always have to do my best.
And this time at least, my best was good enough.