20 August 2014

Woes of a Lazy Mom

First week of school this week.  My daughter and my youngest son are in school full time.  My middle son chose to do online public school from home.  When he chose that, I was thinking, "Oh, that'll be easy!  The school provides all the materials and curriculum.  There's a teacher available if the student doesn't understand something.  This will be easy."

Famous last words.

Yesterday was the first day back to school.  I dropped my oldest and youngest off at their respective schools and came home, only to realize my son and I didn't know how to run this whole online school thing.  It also didn't help that neither of us got much sleep.  There may have been tears and threats involved, which probably isn't part of the curriculum.  By the time I picked up my oldest and youngest from school, I'd had a full day and had already thrown in the towel.  When my husband got home, I fed everyone the easiest dinner I could think of and plopped on my bed.  That's when my husband came in and said, "No, no, no!  If you sleep now I won't get to talk to you at all today."

I lifted my weary head off the mattress and relegated my headache to the background again, because I'm that kind of wife.  (Awesome.  I'm an awesome wife.  In case you missed it.)

School went much better today, but I'm still wondering how traumatic it would be if I chucked my son at the nearest school marquee tomorrow morning and drove off.

11 August 2014

Back To School

Three weeks ago I got news of a mult-stake clothing swap, just in time for school shopping.  If you're not acquainted with clothing swaps, first let me offer my condolences, then let me explain why these are the best idea anyone ever had.

You know all the clothes in your closet you haven't worn in a while because they don't suit you, or they're out of style, or they don't fit, or whatever?  You take those clothes to the swap, and everyone else does the same.  Then, you get to sort through and pick out whatever you like from what other's brought in.  Free.  Can I say that again?  Free!

After three long, long weeks of anticipation, the day finally arrived.  My daughter and I headed out early, hopeful of beating the crowds, and maybe finding the good stuff before someone else.

Evidently, I'm not the only woman out there that wants free stuff.  We got to the church five minutes before the doors were supposed to open and the place was packed.  I beelined right to the little boys' clothes and had no luck in finding something nice in the right sizes.  Then I wandered for a while.  Picking up a shirt for my husband and making sure my daughter was having fun.  Then I planted myself in front of the tables piled with women's clothing.

At the end, my daughter had found some nice things.  My husband got one shirt.  The boys will need to go to an actual store.  I came home with WAY more than anyone else.  Kind of a sad commentary on how I think.

But I need to say again that it was Free.

04 August 2014

So You Think You Can Watch?

The universe has conspired against me.  It saddens me, but it's true.

I only like one or two television shows enough to make a stink about not being able to watch them when the new season comes out.  Sherlock is one.  Call the Midwife is another.  Sometimes I like House, or Bones enough to whinge about it.  But there is one show that I consistently want to watch and the lucky winner is So You Think You Can Dance.

There is something about the beauty and athleticism inherent in good dancers that I can't get enough of. I love that they dance in every genre, and even when I don't like the dances or the music, or the contestants, or the judges (Grrr to Mary Murphy's hot tamale train), I savor it all.  Every minute of it.

Perhaps that's why the universe has conspires against me.  I enjoy it too much and therefore, according to the puritan values my ancestors embraced, it is not allowed.

I cannot watch it via computer because my computer is too old to support the website.  YouTube has only clips when my soul demands full episodes, and I cannot endure missing anything.  We don't have regular TV or cable or dish or anything, so that's out.  I got so desperate that I went to my friend's house to watch it on her TV even though it was clearly an imposition on her time with her husband.

Last night, I got all excited, thinking I'd be able to watch it now on our Apple TV, but that also is a no go because evidently, you have to already have TV in order to watch TV.  Clearly, the entertainment Execs have been talking to economists.

And me?  I'm not feeling very kindly towards my puritan ancestors.